Tonight I will get to attend the Easter vigil service. I haven't taken part in Holy services since the year before Asher was born. I remember specifically getting ready to leave for the Good Friday service and deciding to go to the bathroom at the last minute. I saw blood and thought, "well, I guess I'm not pregnant after all." I was certain I had conceived. Later I would learn that that was my baby making himself nice and comfy and secure...Asher was my Lenten babe, this one is my Advent. What does any of it mean? I haven't a clue. But I ponder it--life--as I prepare to go and greet it in celebration. And it makes me wonder what it is I was certain was dead within me--what is it that even now is being resurrected?