Tomorrow we welcome our baby girl into our arms and my focus today consists of completing all of my internal "to do's." At the top of the list is to finally extract a post which has been written umpteen hundred times inside my brain since June. As I sit here today, my last morning pregnant, my girl makes her presence known by kicking at the laptop. bounce, bounce, bounce....
The song "Somewhere Over the Rainbow," as sung by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, first made it's way into my ears via the death scene of Dr. Green on ER. The song was haunting and perfect and dug it's way deep into my psyche. Since this was in the archaic days of pre-Google and Itunes, the song was rather illusive and secret. In common conversation it would be referred to like, "that one song." Every now and again it would pop up in the media (ala Billie Elliot) and stop my heart.
In 2002 I was working as a chaplain at a children's hospital--confronting daily the complexity of death amongst life--all while Bill and I were planning our wedding. This song was with me then. For us a huge part of getting the feeling of our wedding day right, revolved around the music that would be played. We had pre-wedding music, the wedding music, post wedding music....a complete soundtrack for the event, each one vital (to us) for setting the mood. This particular song was part of the cocktail hour playlist and it's poignancy was so great I can still recall exact details from when it rang out.
I remember getting into place for pictures with Bill's family--his beautiful, beautiful family (now mine!) when the opening notes began--trying to contain the emotion in my heart, to absorb the reality as it unfolded. I willed time to slow and accepted as best I could the gift of the moment.
Since then this song has been a host to hold and uplift many more moments.
Back in early June Asher and I were filling up the minutes till dinner by listening to Pandora and dancing. To be honest, I was rather tired and simply going through the motions to appease him. I wasn't present. "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" came on and my heart was stirred. I looked into the eyes of the boy before me. I held my belly and brought the girl into the dance. My mind asked, "Who am I to be so lucky?" as a shift occurred in the room. Tears may have been shed.
Later that evening Asher was put to bed but wasn't sleeping. After an hour or so of hearing him talk Bill went to check on him. He came down and asked if I had talked to Asher about his sister--specifically had I told him her name? Not recently, no-- and certainly not her whole name. why? Asher was in bed talking to Iris. Amelie Iris--our "hard working rainbow."
That night, after Asher finally went to sleep, Bill and I watched the season finale of Glee. The serendipitousness of life cannot be made up.
The song "Somewhere Over the Rainbow," as sung by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, first made it's way into my ears via the death scene of Dr. Green on ER. The song was haunting and perfect and dug it's way deep into my psyche. Since this was in the archaic days of pre-Google and Itunes, the song was rather illusive and secret. In common conversation it would be referred to like, "that one song." Every now and again it would pop up in the media (ala Billie Elliot) and stop my heart.
In 2002 I was working as a chaplain at a children's hospital--confronting daily the complexity of death amongst life--all while Bill and I were planning our wedding. This song was with me then. For us a huge part of getting the feeling of our wedding day right, revolved around the music that would be played. We had pre-wedding music, the wedding music, post wedding music....a complete soundtrack for the event, each one vital (to us) for setting the mood. This particular song was part of the cocktail hour playlist and it's poignancy was so great I can still recall exact details from when it rang out.
I remember getting into place for pictures with Bill's family--his beautiful, beautiful family (now mine!) when the opening notes began--trying to contain the emotion in my heart, to absorb the reality as it unfolded. I willed time to slow and accepted as best I could the gift of the moment.
Since then this song has been a host to hold and uplift many more moments.
Back in early June Asher and I were filling up the minutes till dinner by listening to Pandora and dancing. To be honest, I was rather tired and simply going through the motions to appease him. I wasn't present. "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" came on and my heart was stirred. I looked into the eyes of the boy before me. I held my belly and brought the girl into the dance. My mind asked, "Who am I to be so lucky?" as a shift occurred in the room. Tears may have been shed.
Later that evening Asher was put to bed but wasn't sleeping. After an hour or so of hearing him talk Bill went to check on him. He came down and asked if I had talked to Asher about his sister--specifically had I told him her name? Not recently, no-- and certainly not her whole name. why? Asher was in bed talking to Iris. Amelie Iris--our "hard working rainbow."
That night, after Asher finally went to sleep, Bill and I watched the season finale of Glee. The serendipitousness of life cannot be made up.
That is so incredibly beautiful. It gives me chills!